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“You are going to feel like hell if you never write the stuff that is tugging on the sleeves of your heart — your stories, visions, memories, visions and songs. Your truth, your version of things, your own voice. That is really all you have to offer us. And that’s also why you were born.”
Anne Lamott

“You are going to feel like hell if you never write the stuff that is tugging on the sleeves of your heart — your stories, visions, memories, visions and songs. Your truth, your version of things, your own voice. That is really all you have to offer us. And that’s also why you were born.”
Anne Lamott

Category: Faith Challenges

The Depth of My Sin

George 0 Comments

I have a list of subjects that I intend to write about. Because of my most recent “blog slog” that list has continued to grow. Having finally forced myself to write something, I am faced with which subject to choose. I have chosen to write about  “The Depth of My Sin”

The following is a true story.

I am a good neighbor. I love my neighbors. I try diligently to help them whenever possible. I am obedient to Jesus’ 2nd most important command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” I find significant righteousness in loving my neighbors. 

Recently, loving my neighbor, as I often do, I had agreed to take my disabled friend and neighbor to his physical therapy appointment. Taking the time to interrupt my day, I arrive at his house to pick him up and was surprised to find that he was not at home. Puzzled, I called him on his cell phone to find out that he was already at the therapist, having gotten another ride. Obviously he had not let me know.  What happened next is disturbing.

I was angry. How could he be so inconsiderate? The least he could have done was give me a call. I had put aside other things to help him. I immediately called on my latent, but highly skilled  talents from my years as a manager at Ford Motor Company to teach (?) correct (?) discipline (?) so he would not do such again. My words were sharp and direct, I spoke truth about his lack of consideration and common curtesy. I was energized by exposing such unacceptable behavior. 

His response was deep contrition and profuse apology. My parting thought, if not my words, was “don’t let it happen again”. 

Only after I ended the call, did it occur to me how much I had shamed my neighbor and reinforced his perceptions of himself that he is a worthless, useless shell of man that has lost his dignity and purpose in life. 

 

I am a good neighbor. I love my neighbors.

Not so much, I do good things for my neighbors, but do I truly love them? 

Do you love your neighbors? Yes Lord! 

Then wash their feet.

Do you love your neighbors? Yes Lord!

Then bind their wounds.

Do you love your neighbors? Yes Lord!

Then love them as I have loved you.

 

Lord help me for I am broken.

HOW IT HAPPENS

George 0 Comments

Last Sunday’s sermon was based Revelation chapter 2 addressed the “Ephesus problem” – they had abandoned their first love. The quote below was cited and it resonated deeply with me. It could very well be my own testimony as to “how it happens”.

How does it happen, this loss of first first love? My friend Earl Palmer still understands the tragedy best. “The Ephesus problem” he writes, “happens quietly and by gradual imperceptible shifts of focus.” Palmer goes on:

A man or woman is first united with the Christian church because of having discovered and believed in Jesus Christ and his love. After a few years of being a Christian, that person becomes leader in the church with very heavy responsibilities for the fellowship. But something happens along the way. That person – who, because of giftedness and hard work, may now stand at the vortex of church politics and decision making – experiences a subtle shift in style of life. That person is adrift as a disciple and find himself or herself motivated and nourished by the organization or by controversy or by ambition to hold power. The first love has been abandoned, and in its places the starchy, high-cholesterol diet of activity and church work that will never nourish the human soul. 

Palmer the makes this profound insight:

The irony of this latter condition of ‘the Ephesus syndrome’ is that the Christian becomes totally preoccupied, fascinated with themes and goals that would have never won him her in the first place to have joined the church.  Arguments over fine doctrinal points, distinctions of polity, exoteric giftedness, etc. How can it happen to us? It happens to marriages, It happens to human friendships. It happens to the life of discipleship,

“You left your first love.”

Prayer as Conversation

George 0 Comments

This is a repost from 2007.

Recently a class discussion centered on the idea of prayer being conversation with God. It was suggested that an understanding of prayer as conversation with God can not only have a profound impact on our prayer life, it can be a window through which we can assess our relationship with God. Just as the character of our conversation in human relationships betrays the health of the relationship, so it is with God. For example if conversations with friend or family never progress beyond the trivial and/or self centered yada… yada… yada; at best, the relationship will not grow and most likely will diminish over time. On the other hand, when conversations reflect mutual interest and concern, share inner feelings, fears and desires, it is a sign of a healthy relationship. As I think about this, I am grieved by the shallowness of some of my conversations with friends and family and what that indicates about the quality of our relationship. It is also true of my relationship with God as I think of the prayers I offer and their meagerness and superficialness. It is important to resist the temptation to think that the solution to having healthy relationships is simply start having meaningful conversations. That is not the case. What I am suggesting is that an assessment of the character of our conversations will help us to understand the health of our relationships, it is an occasion for truthfulness. It will force us to the question, “How can my relationship become healthier”? That is the real question. When we answer that question, meaningful conversations will prevail.