“You are going to feel like hell if you never write the stuff that is tugging on the sleeves of your heart — your stories, visions, memories, visions and songs. Your truth, your version of things, your own voice. That is really all you have to offer us. And that’s also why you were born.”
Anne Lamott
“You are going to feel like hell if you never write the stuff that is tugging on the sleeves of your heart — your stories, visions, memories, visions and songs. Your truth, your version of things, your own voice. That is really all you have to offer us. And that’s also why you were born.”
Anne Lamott
A picture of the Chicago skyline taken almost 60 miles away, is actually a mirage.
My previous posts on “what is true and real?” have been focused on spiritual belief, examining the “mirage” quality of my faith. I have not exhausted that subject but today I want to look at “what is true and real?” in the context of our deeply divided society.
Since watching the events of January 6 and listening to voices echoing sentiments of those who stormed the capitol, I have wrestled with anxiety and struggled to remain calm and resist the urge to vent. This post has been in the oven for a week or more. Every time I started to write, my mind was muddled, my thoughts so random that I couldn’t continue. Hopefully, my thoughts have marinated enough to make sense not just an echo of continuing outrage.
I have become convinced our answers to “What is true and real?”is what divides us. There is no question, those with whom I disagree believe their narrative is true and real. One principle which neither of us are willing to compromise … there can be only one truth.. leaves no capacity for empathy, sympathy, mercy, much less compromise. Being “right” justifies dismissal and condemnation of them. (just their views, after all I hate the sin not the sinner).
For those near, dismissal and condemnation is hidden, for others, my resentment, anger, disdain, hatred, is restrained by a costume of righteousness…the seams of which are weakening. Facts, data are useless in the face of self-certified truth. Bias, preconception, self-righteousness are fruits of our secular autonomous selves. I find few exceptions to that conundrum on either side. Unless we are willing to accept protracted conflict and further dismantling of our democracy and relationships, dismissal and demonization of “them” is not a viable option. Unfortunately, I am seeing more and more people willing to sacrifice any and everything to defend “truth”. After conversations and calmer reflection, I have remained steadfast in my condemnation of insurrection, violence and hatred. However, it would be a mistake to dismiss “them” in mass. As in all tribes and families, there are toxic people that must be dismissed and/or abandoned to proper consequences. Toxic people have such an outsized influence on our perceptions of the world, something as simple as blocking or unfollowing 5-10% of the people you used to follow, and checking the news once a week instead of once a day, can be completely transformational for your day-to-day experience and general mood. Mark Manson
I want to believe the solution is simple… truth is truth… so what’s the problem? Absolute truth? For most of my life I held an uncontested belief that truth is absolute. A belief supported by unexamined assertions of my religious education. For example: “All truth is found in the Bible.” “… you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” “the Bible is inerrant and infallible” Armed with confidence that “truth is absolute” any … inherited, discerned, or taught truth was indisputable. I was a willing to defend truth at all costs. When you believe you have the truth and truth is absolute. there are no limits. Are you sure it is true?
As much as possible, refrain from judging others. Assume that they are struggling secretly as well. Remember that our battle is with the passions. Fr Stephen Freeman
Today is there is much to think about but unlike my usual ramblings, the focus is on the yesterday’s events. There is no shortage of opinions, observations, commentaries on one of the most disturbing experiences in my memory.
As I watched the scene, as expected, video captured the most vocal and extreme rioters, insurrectionists. But I also noticed footage of the margins of the crowd. Unlike those those leading the violent breech of the capital, people on margin, casually walking about, looked familiar. They looked like …friends, family, acquaintances … encountered over the past few years, and with whom in the course of conversations discovered our differences, resulting mostly in silence or avoidance of the subject. I am struggling with the temptation to paint everyone in the crowd with same brush, or worse, all 70,000,000 sympathizers. No question there are some that should and, hopefully, will be prosecuted. But people on the margin were familiar for another reason… they look like me. They, like myself, are struggling with their passions. My immediate challenge is to refrain from judging them. I believe the best restraint from judging others is a look in the mirror. I am not optimistic about my ability or willingness to see myself truthfully but, I was encouraged by a few members of congress yesterday.
The Message paraphrase of the “Do not judge..” passage in the Sermon on the Mount is helpful: ““Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.” Matthew 7:1-5 MSG
A nagging question in all of this has been “how”. How could they …??? When that question arises I remind myself of my own experience which I have written about and shared a lot.
Some time around 1970, Ford Motor Company in Louisville, Ky initiated a program to hire hard core unemployable people to work as assembly operators. At that time I was a General Foreman in production assembly. Because of the dramatic challenges of integrating the hard core unemployable into the existing culture, a series of training sessions were conducted to better equip management employees. It was in one of those sessions that I encountered a life altering experience.
There were approximately 40-50 salaried employees participating in the training session. We were subjected to a variety of lectures and exercises designed to help us understand and deal with the cultural differences we would face as we managed what seemed to be unmanageable people.
The instructor told us we would be doing a problem solving exercise. We could not take notes but were to listen carefully to the problem and determine individually the correct answer. The problem was simple enough. It involved the sale of a mule between two farmers. There were three or four purchases and repurchases for different prices. The problem to be solved was who finally owned the mule and how much did the seller profit?
Given a few moments to think about our answers, the instructor asked us to share our answers. I thought that was unnecessary since it was such simple problem and I had determined the correct answer almost immediately. Expecting that everyone else would have the same answer, I was surprised that there were four or five different answers. At that point I was feeling some satisfaction in having the correct answer.
Next we were instructed to form groups based on our answers. Four or five groups emerged. The number of people in the groups varied from 10-12, 7-8, etc and my group with 4. Again, I was a bit surprised how few had gotten the answer correct. Once we were grouped, the instructor told us to discuss our answer within our group. Following that discussion, we were told that we could change groups if we so desired. The largest group gained some members, one of whom was from my group.
The next step involved each group sending a representative to the other groups to convince them that their answer was correct. Following some passionate argument and pleas, once again we were given the opportunity to change our answer and join the agreeing group. I was pleased that none of my group departed but mystified that none joined us.
The final step involved each group sending a representative to work out their answer in writing on the white board. I represented our group and was pleased at how clearly I was able to illustrate the correct answer. Confident that people would finally realize how mistaken they were, I welcomed the final opportunity for people to change their minds and join my group. I watched with disappointment as another of my group departed for the largest group. No one joined my group. There were now three groups. My group with myself and one other, a second group with 4-5 people and the large group with everyone else.
At this point, it is important to understand how invested I had become in the exercise. My mind was racing and my emotions were deepening. I was truly flabbergasted at the results of the exercise. It had become personal.
To conclude the exercise, the instructor chose two people to represent the farmers and provided money for the transaction. I should not have been surprised that he chose me to be one of the farmers. To assure that there would be no question about the outcome, we methodically acted out the transactions. Carefully we passed the money with each exchange. At the conclusion, I possessed the money and was asked to count it for everyone to see. Convinced I had calculated the answer correctly, I gladly complied.
WRONG! I was wrong. There was no doubt.
The impact of that moment for me cannot be overstated. I was embarrassed and shamed. My arrogance and self-righteousness were exposed. How could I have been so deaf and blind? Any thought of humble acceptance escaped me. Thankfully the obvious outcome spared me the unfamiliar words: “I was wrong”. Almost immediately, the thought crossed my mind,
“If I was wrong about this, what else am I wrong about?
Hindsight, ever the cruelest and most astute adviser” R.J. Ellory, Bad Signs
It seems review the past year is compulsory. This post is a submission to that demand. I am reluctant to comment on 2020 primarily because of Ellory’s judgement of hindsight…it is a cruel and astute adviser.
2020 confirmed Pogo’s wisdom.
202o… … Impeachment/acquittal …Covid-19 Pandemic … Social and political upheaval … Death of George Floyd/ riots, protests … Quarantines/Lockdowns … Economic collapse … Presidential campaigns/elections exploding flares illuminating the landscape of my life exposing my delusions, misconceptions, misunderstandings and sins. With each occurrence, disappointing realities have been revealed …biases, fears, anger, hatred, prejudices, doubts, impatience and rudeness. The assault has has been relentless. Secreted idols have been exposed, stripping away naive facades of my faith. Surprisingly, 2020 did not leave me disheartened. My temptation is to attribute survival to the triumph of my faith, but that would be disingenuous. Hindsight reveals a coping strategy dependent on observing and condemning “them”, shielding me from the truth… “the enemy is me”. It saddens to think I may well have squandered an opportunity for spiritual growth in 2020 for “thirty pieces of silver”?
Unlike Judas, my filthy lucre can be redeemed. 2020 is not the end, 2021 it is not the beginning of the end, it is the next page in a story that continues to be written. 2021 is not a light at the end of the tunnel but a bright star in the dark night, the star of David leading me through darkness…the end always in sight.
Ellory is right: Hindsight, ever the cruelest and most astute adviser.
Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Deuteronomy 4:9
What will we teach our children and their children about 2020?
It is hard to believe the end of 2020 is just a few days away. The calendar year is closing, hopefully the beginning of the end of the pandemic.
This post highlights what I consider my top 5 posts fo 2020. Sorry for this exercise in a bit of self-aggrandizement, but after all, isn’t that what having a blog is all about? Listed in descending order, these posts were selected based on originality and personally relevant content. I am open to other nominations.
# 5 – SAY WHAT? This post made the cut for its farcical idea. I remain hopeful someone will pick up on it and develop a desperately needed “SAY WHAT?” app.
#4 – THE SKY IS FALLING An opportunity for me to gloat a bit. This post, written prior to the emergence of the pandemic, was prescient. My advice, though largely ignored, remains relevant.
#1 – THE CHRISTIAN VALUE – AGAPE The concluding post to my series on Christian Values, Agape emerges as The Christian Value. If you are going to only read one of my posts for 2020, this is it.
Like most people, I live with some serious self-delusions. One, among many, is the delusion that I am a theologian. Perhaps it’s a result of close proximity to Asbury Theological Seminary and my regular interaction with seminarians and, occasionally, a real theologian. I am happily content and inwardly (?) pridefully thinking I’m a theologian.Undoubtedly,I am serious about theology. Unfortunately being serious about theology doesn’t make one a theologian. The difference between me and a theologian is like the difference between Dr. Fauci and Donald Trump. I have lot to say, but I’m not an expert. I’m not saying I don’t have something worthwhile to say theologically, I just need to remember who I am. The truth of the matter is…I’m more like Gomer Pyle than N.T. Wright.
That reality came to mind this morning. In the course of my regular readings, I have these “Golly Shazam” moments where my ignorance becomes obvious and my reaction is “Golly Shazam”. Those moments are powerful antidotes to my self-delusions. Momentarily, I feel the innocent, humbling and joyous experience of discovery. In is on those occasions I am most like Gomer.. “Golly Shazam”.
Today was a double header for “Golly Shazam”. I will share one encounter from today and the other in my next “Golly Shazam” post
The Temptation of Joseph “Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.” Matthew? 1:19 NIV
…one of the notorious things Adam does to Eve is throw her under the bus, blaming her, when God confronts him in the garden. …Adam’s sin against Eve symbolizes all of the sins of men against women throughout history. Similar, then, to how Mary overturns the sins of Eve, Joseph has to stand in his moment of perplexity and doubt to reverse the sin of Adam against Eve. In Adam, men blame and stigmatize women. Men don’t believe women, Joseph’s trial, then, is that a man must believe a woman. Joseph has to believe Mary. And in believing Mary, Joseph overturns the sin of Adam.
“For the perpetual excuse Of Adam for his fall– ‘My little Eve, God bless her, did beguile me and I ate’ you must now atone, Joseph, in silence and alone.”
As a man, Joseph must endure the trial of being himself marginalized and excluded: “To-day the roles are altered; you must be
The Weaker Sex whose passion is passivity.” “You must learn now that masculinity, To Nature, is a non-essential luxury.”
The temptation of Joseph is passing as a man, and for all men, this trial of marginalization and doubt. To reverse the sin of Adam against Eve, Joseph must accept his peripheral role and believe Mary.
